Raising a Ruckus over the Holidays

flickr, judibird


I was going to write about what a wonderful time of year it is.  But then, I couldn’t think of a second sentence.

That’s because these weeks of societal scripted celebration don’t seem any more joyous than any other season of my life.

The truth is EVERY time of year has become wonderful for me.  I can’t believe I even get to write this – truthfully – because it seems like I was always the person waiting for this or that situation to pass before I could REALLY take a meaningful turn in my own life and build a life that mattered to me.

It was my job to make everyone else’s way easier.

I don’t know if society teaches girls to live this way, and – honestly – I am no longer interested in going down that rabbit hole of pointless naval-gazing.  You can lose whole long years talking about how “unfair” shit is.

Unfair to whom?

I always had food and shelter and education.  I had access to healthcare.  My kids always had schools and shoes, so what the hell do I need to complain about?

On the other hand, I’ve learned to be very careful with that line of thinking, too.  Sometimes we stay stuck because we feel bad for wanting more.

I don’t feel bad.

I wanted more.

Or, rather, I wanted “other.”

Or, rather, I wanted “also.”

YES!  That’s what I wanted.  I wanted my family and our blessings but I ALSO wanted to build something important.

Something no one else could do.

Something that had my creative DNA all over it.

I just didn’t know what that thing was.

Oh, I knew it had something to do with speaking.  I FEEL so magical and TRANSPORTED in front of a group.  More than that, I feel a kind of magical shaking at my center that feels like TRUTH coming through me.

Not my truth, though, my experience is an important part of the work.

But THE truth.   I can feel the Spirit of Grace or something coming through me.

(Good Lord, I hope we have loved each other long enough for me to confess that!)

Oh, well, there you have it.

Anyway, when I work with groups, I can FEEL some energy that feels —  HUGE – coming through me.  My job is to stay spiritually fit so my ego can edge just a bit to the side to allow that to happen.

And, to work my ass off testing and retesting my work to make sure it WORKS – that I’m not just pimping a load of crap.

Anyway, for a couple of years now, since I began to crack the code on how women at midlife are in the IDEAL position to make changes that stick, I have been – not just happy.  Nope, though happiness does visit often.

What I’ve been is CONTENT.  I’ve been peaceful, serene, and absolutely CERTAIN that I am on the “right” path at long last.

The truth is, I probably could have done it sooner.  But fear and sometimes resentment kept me stuck.  I also had a little dollop of that victim thing going on, too.

So, what does that mean for Beautiful You?

Well, when I started Life After Tampons, I wanted to achieve TWO basic goals.

1.  I wanted Life After Tampons to be a key source of tools, inspiration, hope, and community to any woman who wanted to change her life – REGARDLESS of her ability to pay anything. 

2.  I wanted to completely rebrand the way the world thinks of women at midlife.  I wanted the world to change.  I wanted “them” to give “us” value.  But I quickly saw the error in that objective.


It’s not “they” who need to change.

It is WE.


WE need to change.  WE need to rethink our own self-worth.

And then, WE NEED TO ACT!



With a clear mind and sound tools and tested STRATEGIC methods.

Goal Number 1 is already well under way.  If you want to change your life, whether you and I ever work together directly or not, you can benefit from the HUNDREDS of blog posts I’ve created for Beautiful You.  If you’re stuck, you can read – and IMPLEMENT – the ideas in my free book, Breakthrough, and you can join our community and get your free strategic Comeback QuickStart.

My work now shifts to Goal Number 2.  I want to find a bigger way to spread the message of hope to women who haven’t found us yet.

I’m going to play a bigger game.  Phew.  I said it.

I’ll share more with you in the coming weeks.  For now though, I did want to share one “aha” I’ve had since creating our strategic comeback system, Your Midlife Insurrection™:

In creating your own personal Insurrection the only thing you need to overthrow is . . .

. . . Yourself.

Peace on Earth.  Viva la Resistance!

Love, Jen

P.S.  The final Insurrection group of 2013 starts next week.  If you’re interested, email jen at jennifer@lifeaftertampons.com ASAP.  There won’t be another group until February 2014.

photo: flickr, judibird


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15 Responses to Raising a Ruckus over the Holidays

  1. Patty says:

    Amen and Hell Yah! Jen!
    One of the biggest take aways I’m gleaning from the Insurrection is breaking a life-long habit of fear based procrastination. It has opened me up to allowing grace and flow in my life.
    Thank you!

  2. Beth says:

    Best phrase of 2013- “pointless naval-gazing!” Love it!

  3. Carol says:

    The minute I saw this picture, I knew I would love the post. And I was right. Amen and hell yes. I love the way you think. Thanks for helping shake me out of complacency and fear and perfectionism. I can’t wait to keep working with you. Big hugs.

  4. Stephanie says:

    I too am SO sick of the traditional female roll of cooking, cleaning, and doing EVERYTHING to run a household I could puke! When, I brush away the feelings of being tired, exhausted, frustrated, and just plain jealous of the men sitting in the recliner reading today’s newspaper… I am angry! I am pissed off that I work just as many hours at my career as he does but I then come home and work another 8 hours cooking, serving a warm meal every night, washing dishes, mopping the floor, vacuuming, feeding the animals, doing laundry, clipping coupons, packing my lunch, ( the last two are to save money), all because he has a penis and I don’t!! Why is there a double standard just because two people are different sexes? The holidays- Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Years multiply my anger by tenfold for now it means doing all of the mentioned above but for 10-15 additional family members. And people have the nerve to wonder why a woman is labeled as grouchy!? Hello? get off your ass and help run the household instead of expecting to be served like you are royalty! Ugggg!

    • Jennifer says:

      Um, love, unless he reads my website, your message is not getting across. One thing I’ve learned — we teach other people how we want to be treated. Maybe stop doing so much and see if life still goes on. Make some tea and sit down with him. You can eat crackers for dinner for a couple of days until you figure something else out. Love, Jen

  5. acwill300 says:

    Far too much time has been spent thinking I can’t even when there was no real obstacle. Your post just confirmed that I have to get out of my way.

  6. Cecelia says:

    Wow, Jen! You really nailed it in this post. So much here…
    One of my favorite sayings I coined in the past couple of years is, “Are you content with the content of your life?”
    I’m working on a BIG project, still all behind the scenes but more bits continue to come together, and the main theme is to identify the lies we are living – but even more so – to identify/find pointers in the direction of our truth. All of this, is of course, related to claiming our worth. (or to uncover it, for some) Once I’m up and running I’d love to feature this post on my site, if you are game? 🙂

    • Jennifer says:

      Hi, Cecelia. Congratulations on stepping out on your own behalf. When you are ready to “go live” reach out again and we’ll talk about next steps. Jen

  7. Patti says:

    “In creating your own personal Insurrection the only thing you need to overthrow is . . . MYself.” I also need to get out of my own way. As I was reading your post I thought “After the holidays when I have time for me, I’ll start this” and then it occurred to me that this is exactly what is in my way…ME. The time is NOW and the task is ME! Thanks, Jen. {HUGS}

  8. Theresa says:


    You are still rocking it! I’m late in reading this post due to all the holiday “stuff”. Can I just say that going through the Insurrection is part of the reason I didn’t read your post until now? It was not on my 15″ “to-do” list during the holidays. Ha! Sorry about that! I’m getting better at honoring my needs and wants and “also’s” (love this!). Keep on doing what you are doing!


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