On Teachers

Denise Krebs

There is such a temptation at this point to “latch on” to other women who are “farther” on the path and seem to have it all together.

Maybe that’s a good idea. Maybe not.

I believe in teachers. I certainly believe in coaches. What I don’t believe in is swapping out your own wisdom with the wisdom of others just because they seem to have their shit together.

There comes a time, sweetheart, when you need to spread your own wings and fly.

Trust.
Yourself.

Love, Jen

photo: Flickr, Denise Krebs

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Outrageous Tuesday: On Eating “Dirty”

The Marmot

My center son was incensed the other day when so many people felt a need to “help me” manage what is a normal emotion – anger. I hadn’t thought about it, really, but then I could see his point.

He suggested I start something called “Inappropriate Monday,” to address the things that need to be discussed but are minimized or trivialized in our society – heck, even here in our little community – and, since he’s winning scholarships and all, I thought, “What the heck, maybe he has a point?”

Welcome to our first (and mayhaps only) Outrageous Tuesday. Here you’ll find all the things that even I am afraid to say.

Today’s topic is “On Eating Dirty.”

So I saw another post go by this morning about “eating clean” and, of course, that made me think of all the people in life who can’t afford to eat clean.

I suppose they “eat dirty.”

I wonder when our food choices became a status symbol? The first I remember being really offended by the whole thing was when juicing became a thing.

It seemed like everybody who was anybody was spending six to eight bucks a morning on veggies or carryout juices.

As a former single mother, I was appalled. I mean, grab a banana for god’s sake.

The other day I had lunch with someone who is on a very tight budget right now and we talked about how much more expensive it is to eat nutritionally than it is to eat junkier stuff. Many people simply can’t afford it and the truth is it’s cheaper to eat “dirty” than clean.

Way, WAY cheaper.

We might wish it would be otherwise, but it isn’t. And please don’t get me started on the sanctimonious thread about “choices” and “sacrifices” and such. When you are living on the margins, those choices are not available to Beautiful You.

Eating well is a luxury.

Way back in the day – I mean, way, way back – I remember being all torn up about the way we divide ourselves up into “the cool people” and everyone else. Maybe if I had been one of the cool ones, I would have liked it more.

That shit should end with childhood. But it doesn’t. And we promulgate it by the use of our language around what we choose to put on our supper plate.

It’s a privilege to be able to afford fresh vegetables. And nuts. Don’t even get me started on nuts.

If you can afford organic you are very wealthy indeed.

If you have chosen to “eat clean” and you can afford to do so, blessings are indeed upon you. But let’s not use our dietary choices to divide us into the have’s and the have not’s.

It reeks of ingratitude and fancied superiority.
It makes light of our own blessings.

And it keeps us from truly loving each other.

With Outrageous Love, Jen

Photo: Flickr: The Marmot

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Soulful Sunday — Happy May Day!

donald judge

This Sunday happens to also fall on May Day, the pagan holiday of Beltane. I don’t know what you believe, and, honestly, I don’t know what I believe half the time, but one thing I KNOW I believe is that it is more strategic to believe something than to believe nothing.

Basically, the odds are with believers, and so I’m a believer, even though I already was before that whole strategic thing dawned on me.

I’ve been missing people lately, people who have already “gone on.” And one thing that those who celebrate Beltane believe is that this is one of two days during the year when the “veil” between mortal and immortal is the thinnest.

Thus, we are closer to those who have moved on on days like today.

Again, I don’t know if this is real or not, but it makes me feel better to believe it is so, and so I believe.

I miss my daughter. I miss my grandfather. I don’t know if I miss my father or not, since I never really knew him, but I do miss the idea of him.

But Beltane isn’t just about the mysteries, it’s also a celebration of the return of the Sun, and I know I can shout a big happy, “Hallelujah” about that.

Seasons and feelings and situations and relationships all come. And they go. I’ve been happiest in my life when I’ve been able to just “be” in the midst of all of that.

Resistance is what hurts most.

Today, must therefore be about letting go.
Again, and again, and again.

Blessed Be.
And let it begin with me.

Love, Jen

Photo: flickr, Donald Judge

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All the Rage

Brieuc Saffre

So, I’m trying to write something printable today and all I got is RAGE.

Does that ever happen to Beautiful You?

You’re going along in life, and nothing is really wrong, you just feel really really angry.

It’s a quiet rage, a party of one.

If you were sitting in front of me right now you wouldn’t know it. I know this because a friend of mine IS sitting in front of me right now and he doesn’t have a clue.

I’m good at masking.
Because, truly, you kinda have to be.

What’s the point of raging against the world?
At the bottom of it I have a pretty good life.

So, the rage confuses me.
But it comes. And I pretend like it’s not here. And the pretending hurts me. So I eat something. And that makes me mad at myself.

And then the rage turns inward.
And that triggers sadness.

And, if I stay there too long – depression. And we know how well I deal with that.

So, “hello, beautiful Rage.
What are you trying to say to me today?”

Oh, I just got an answer. Rage said, “peanut M&M’s.”

I think I’d better start over.

Love, Jen

photo: flickr, Brieuc Saffre

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